Whole pig

It’s 3:31 PM. I’m in traffic. Driving from South St. Paul to Minneapolis. There’s a red Buick in front of me. Bernie 2016 sticker drive-by. I watch everyone roll bu on my left. Phones in hand eyes on the screen attention tethered.


I have a kayak in the pick up truck. Heading for water.


The radio is playing the Beatles. There’s a professional briefcase next to me that I got for Christmas and stored at my mother-in-law‘s house. Inside it there’s a chew toy for my brother-in-law‘s dog and I’m confiscating it to use as a foot roller to break up planter fasciitis. Right knee hurts. On the inside. From Soccer.


This morning someone messaged me info about (not) vaccinating your kids. Everybody is like whoa what a fucking touchy subject. But it’s all just science right? A question of numbers? Efficacy. Results. Clinical trials. Side effects. Risk. Doesn’t seem like room in the equation really for any bickering back-and-forth and ideology. Give me information or give me death.


There’s a billboard on the southside of 62 that says easy vasectomy. No scalpel. No noodle. Low-cost. Go to ezvasectomy.com


I slept until 830 this morning. The longest and latest I’ve slept since the baby was born a year ago. Must’ve really needed the sleep. Whole body hurts. Knees ankles had sinuses but I’m on the mend you know. Coughing up a real solid phlegm. Green boogers in long chains. Feels good.


Should I work this potentially high-paying landscaping job? Starts at seven am ends whenever they finish maybe five maybe six maybe 7:32 PM. Very hard labor. By high-paying I mean $17 an hour. But you get a lot of hours. Mulch, lift boulders. The problem is my mind. I think lawn care and landscaping and raking grass and even grass itself is bullshit. That’s worth saying again. I think grass is bullshit. And utter waste of time energy and resources. A sponge for fertilizer that drains right into the river and streams and the lake in which I swim. Imagine swimming thru all those fucking fertilizers. And for what for some aesthetic? Might as well get rock and paint it green or dirt and paint it green or just wear some AI filter that makes it seem like there’s grass when there is none? The problem is my mind. I think lawn care and landscaping and raking your grass and even grass itself is cosmetic and silly and engrained cultural conception that’s really superficial but really it’s the superficial stuff that everyone does that becomes the beating bleeding heart of the problem.


Kale. Lettuce. Spinach. Arugula. Tomatoes. Things we can eat. Things you can put in smoothies. Things we can chop up and put on salad. On spaghetti. You get me? What yield does grass have. Except for tired 9 to 5 ers to come home look out their window before collapsing on the couch and devouring a 32 ounce cup of the sofa head TV brain Netflix???


I snack on an orange and a handful of salted cashews.


I went down the street to this little breakfast place called T&T galley. For more information about the cook position. There’s a help wanted sign in the front window. Kate walked by a few days ago and went in and asked and they said they need to fill the cook position. So I thought it made some sense that I came by and asked about the cook position. The guy at the front looked at me like I had six heads and said the position full bro. And I said wait so you’re not looking for any help he said yeah that’s right we just hired two more people and he looked at me like I had six heads and then I said thank you have a good one and smiled but in my head I was like why the fuck are you looking at me like I have six heads?

Regarding the heavy lifting landscaping long hour potentially lots of money job: you got to be careful how you spend your energy, really goddamn careful how yo spend your energy.